Tuesday, May 11, 2010

Fight or Flight

A few weeks ago, a bride friend of ours came to us with an issue.  The best man will soon be related to her and he also happens to hate her.  What to do?  How do we keep this issue from ruining the wedding day?  It is common to see old family issues and new ones arise during a planning process, and no matter who you are in the wedding it is important to remember that a wedding is no place to start an argument. 
For our bride, we told her to first discuss this issue with her fiance, and explain why it is important to sit down with her soon-to-be brother-in-law and have a conversation.  We don't recommend doing this the week prior to the wedding because it is important to put out the fire sooner rather than later.  Always remain calm and even if you can't be friends, then just find a middle ground and some peace to whatever the issue may be.  Maybe bringing some light to the issue will help resolve it.

Another bride has an issue, two of her four bridesmaids hate each other.  The simple solution is once again to explain to each other how important each of them are.  How important it is for them to get along, not cause extra stress and how you don't expect them to be best friends when all is said and done.  If they can't learn to deal with each other, then maybe they shouldn't be in the wedding.  Sometimes it is a hard choice to make but in the end it might be just what you needed to do for your special day.  Being honest right from the start is the best thing.

No matter what issue you may have with someone in the wedding party, or a  guest, a wedding is not the place to air dirty laundry. Consider the fact that you would never want someone to ruin an important day for you, so give that same respect to your friends and family. Always be the bigger person, don't fall for making a scene, and just smile and walk away if someone attempts to start a fight. 

It can be difficult, but in the end you will be pleased with yourself.

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